My mom said this was a great way to save money, but I dont think its right to ask our guest to bring food. Anybody agree with my mom? This is my first time for this and Im trying to plan our wedding with a little help from my about to be sister in law and she also thinks this might be a bad idea.
Dear Potluck friend:
I think it depends on the type of wedding you are having.
If you are renting a beautiful hall and will have all the trimmings, I think a caterer is in order. You can keep hot dishes to a minimum, like say, having a buffet with hot trays of pasta, a rice dish, two or three carved meats, and a bunch of light appetizers. They can also provide some cold meals and a cheese and fruit tray that saves money. What's good about caterers is that they provide all the fixings, the plates, the utensils and the chafing dishes make the table lovely. You save money by not buying all the accessories associated with food.
Instead of hard liquor you could serve a variety of wine and beer and have a rum spiked punch (you can buy a couple of cheap punch bowls from Liquidators or a home discount center. See link below for a tropical punch recipe.
You can set up a beautiful "candy" station on a separate table with jars of old fashioned candy, along with small scoops and bags which could double as favors. You can also buy small trays with a variety of miniature pastries, cookies, danish, macaroons, petit fors and the like, and rent a large cappachino maker along with fancy paper cups to match your decor (I recommend party city or oriental trading which you can search online). I would also rent a chocolate fountain and you can buy marshmellows, strawberries, pretzels, rice crispy treats from Walmart or BJs or Costco. With this you don't have to spend a fortune for a wedding cake. A smaller one would do (even a lovely sheet cake with a nice bride and groom topper) so everyone could have a sliver along with the other treats.
In other words, save money on other things and use your caterer. You should not ask others unless it's a casual set up, like in your local park, or backyard.
You could save cash on florists by buying your centerpieces from Home Depot (they do potted orchids for about $16 apiece. the average wedding centerpiece is about $75 each).
A nice wedding is a special day and deserves some elegance. A pot luck is usually reserved for very casual friends and family.
October 19, 2010
I'd like to also add that this type of wedding reception is regarded very differently by different cultures as well as generations. What is horrifying to some is perfectly natural to others.
Unfortunately, the easiest and most effective way to trim a wedding budget is to trim the guest list if you are putting most of your budget into the reception.
I think part of the frustration with many of the brides I encounter is the tension between the wedding of our dreams and the wedding of our wallet. We fantasize about being the princess at the ball and have to face the reality that this just isn't going to happen. Adjusting expectations is often the first step in wedding planning. We may not get the wedding of our dreams, but we can still have a meaningful, precious and beautiful wedding that celebrates our unique relationship.
Rev. Ann Fuller
October 19, 2010
This doesn't sounds good. As you are inviting them for your wedding.!! So please try some other venue. Like short out the invitation list and prefer out the discount offers in every thing. Prepare your own wedding invitations personally. If you want my help that you are free to ask me.
To this day, the fact that my groom's family and friends brought their "special" recipes to our reception still brings a smile to my face. I only really knew two people at my wedding (my mom and my husband) and my mother-in-law planned just about everything. Our reception was intimate (75 people) and welcoming. The women who brought dishes felt like they contributed to something special, and you could taste the love in their offerings. I see nothing wrong with "pot luck" at a reception. It's the celebration of your new life that your guests want to see. How wonderful that they can contribute a small part to your special day.
October 17, 2010
No - your mom is not right this time. No pot luck for a wedding. No. No. No.
October 16, 2010
No, it's a terrible idea. You are hosting a party; find a simple, affordable venue or caterer; offer wine and beer, and have a great time. But don't ask them to bring food.
My grandma also put her input in of "this is what they use to do back in the day" True???? The 130 people are mainly his family(huge on his side) small on mine, and just a few family friends.
October 16, 2010
Frankly, I think it is a terrible idea...when you invite guests to your wedding you are hosting it. It is acceptable to have a cash bar, but it is rather tacky asking people to pay for or bring food. I hope that helps!